I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
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