A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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