I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
