I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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