eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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