dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
