I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Everyone says I win the strip club
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
