I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
