i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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