If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Randomize
