Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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