Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
ttyl tear gas
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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