I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
