yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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