i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
