Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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