And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize