Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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