I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
