I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
