If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
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