Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You were trust falling into bushes
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
