And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
