As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
