My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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