:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
i've created a new STD.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
