Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize