No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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