I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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