i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
