Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
