i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Randomize
