Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
you made out with another girl for some wings
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize