whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
