Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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