And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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