god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
they need to just BURY HIM!
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
