Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Pants are for mortals
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
