Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
