just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
