Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
