And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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