If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
