I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
