she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
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