I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Come see our sink grown plant.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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