Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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