the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Two words: nipple clamps
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