You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
