I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I had to cum in my sink.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
