I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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